NursingZen

Update: Yes, I’m not alone! A classmate just called me and said: “I just got back from L.A., I’m totally out of it and I don’t remember anything. Help!” Tomorrow’s going to be interesting…

The two weeks have flown by and I quite unexpectedly failed to write for NursingZen. I’m sorry. To my utter surprise, when it came to thoughts about MEPN and even nursing, my brain completely, 100 percent, checked out this vacation.

When I tried to reflect on the first quarter of nursing school, especially because I wanted to share the experiences with you, I found to my horror that some memories were fuzzy, like the picture on an old TV, and some felt unreal, like a dream, but on the whole, my mind went blank. I might as well have had amnesia. I felt like the world of MEPN and of the journey to becoming a nurse belonged to someone else entirely.

Fortunately, it has started to come back to me, though not in the best way: The other day I dreamed I was at the hospital and was completely and totally mismanaging the care of all my patients. It was 7 a.m., and I hadn’t a clue who my preceptor was. Then it was 8 a.m., and I was letting a patient walk all over me. Then it was 9 a.m., and I still didn’t know who my patients were. No one would help me. I sensed doom. Then I woke up. Hmm, so those are my deep fears; that’s the real life that I’ve got to get back to. Tomorrow. Joy!

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